BIG BLACK: AMEN A PEN A CANAL - ENEMA!
BY STEVE ALBINI
(Editor's note: lest this swell article seem a rank batch o' aggrandizement on the part of a thin white dick, allow us to say right here that we s'licited it.)
I can dig the Ramones and the Birthday Party and the Stooges and SPK and Minor Threat and Whitehouse and Link Wray and Chrome and Pere Ubu and Rudimentary Peni and the Four Skins and Throbbing Gristle and Skre Sriver and the Ex and Minimal Man and US Chao
s and Gang Green and Tommi Stumpff and the Swans and Bad Brains all at the same time, and if you can't then fuck you. I don't give two splats of al old negro junkie's vomit for your politico-philosophical treatises, kiddies. I like noise. I like big-ass
vicious noise that makes my head spin. I wanna feel it whipping through me like a fucking jolt. We're so dilapidated and crushed by our own pathetic existence we need it like a fix. Robin Gecht hacked up a bunch of whores in Chicago for it. Gacy
strangled buttboys for it. Dean Corll killed twenty seven (or more) schoolkids for it. Imagine the bang -- not just fucking (which is about as severe a sensation as most people get), but fucking little boys. Poor little innocents who have never done anything
bad to anyone, and here's this savage splitting them asswise. And he Kills them. Mean killings, like with an oxy-acetalyne cutting torch. Or a pissed-on straight raozor. Butfucking little boys while butchering them. That's how bad we need it. Me,
I'm not that desparate yet. I stick with the noise. But an articulated noise that hangs there in your memory and causes further damage. These guys I knew in Montana really dug the whole ranch-hand aspect of the place. Ball cutting, ear notching, lip
tatooing and skull crushing. Especially the skull crushing. They used to love to watch the cows die. It was either that or go home to the trailer park and watch their five half-naked siblings run around in the dirt. What would you do? Big Black is a
way to get the old blood boiling without having to buttfuck and garrotte little boys, or hang around slaughterhouses. It's as simple as that. I want to push myself, the music, the audience and everything involved as close to the precipice as possible.
Although I'm kinda worried about what we'll find there. All the coolest pioneers of this noise spirit seem to have made the trip to the extreme, been unable, or unwilling, to push on, and tossed in the towel. SPK and PiL on Elektra Records, for Christ's
sweet little boy buttfuck murder's sakes. Alan Vega making a disco 12" with Ministry backing him up. The Stranglers using string sections. Colin Newman putting a kibosh on a Wire reunion because his fucking guru told him to leave music forever. Husker
Du soundling like Buffalo Springfield, Bad Company, King Crimson, and Husker Du, all on the smae record. Is there something out there that signals "Hey, that's enough. You've pushed the boundaries far enough, time to go home and suck for a while." I
want to find out. If Big Black sucks in a year's time, you can assume there is. And I'd like to apologize in advnace for any 12" scratch/dub/breakdance remixes we might make.
EH LIVE SIDE FROM MUNCIE INDIANA SOMETIME IN EIGHT SIX / THE STRONG / BIG $ RUSH
ELEPHANT JOKE? / KILL THE COW / YANOMAMO INDIANS / BIRD THANG / BLACK 'N' WHITE
BLACK SAB CRACK / WAY HAP YA' ALL / TOYTOWN DADDY OH!...BINO'S BIG DICK SOUND
ANOTHER SIDE O' LIVE SAME TIME IN MPLS & CLOGLAND / FIRECRACKERS / LOUD COW /
BIRD BAG / GAS JOCKEY HUFF / I THINK I FUCKED YOUR GIRLFRIEND ONCE / HEY THERE
BIG TRUCK / PEOPLE LIKE THAT? / BUMBANDIT....A BERNARD BARON PRODUCTION 1987
THE SOUND OF IMPACT IS DEDICATED. IN MEMORY TO SAM, IN GRATITUDE TO VICKY N.Y.
A WALLS HAVE EARS PROD FOR GOD AND THE GOOD OF THE PEOPLE, FUCK YOU TOO !++++
THIS IS CALLED NOT TWO (BUT THREE) SEEDY PING FLAG SNEAK REVENGE.WAY HAP' YOU BET!
NOT 2
SECOND OFFICER: Yeah, well-wheel lights always on if the gear's down.
CAPTAIN: Now try it.
2341:44
CAPTAIN: Okay We'd like to turn around and come, come back in. Clear on left.
MIAMI APPROACH: Eastern 401, turn left heading one eight zero.
2341:50
CAPTAIN: Huh?
2342:05
FIRST OFFICER: [We did] something to the altitude.
CAPTAIN: What?
2342:07
FIRST OFFICER: We're still at two thousand, right?
2342:09
CAPTAIN: Hey, what's happening here? I...
2342:12
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
The crew of Eastern 401 had failed to monitor the flight intstruments and to detect the descent soon enough to preven impact with the ground. Preoccupation with the nose landing gear allowed the descent to go unnoticed. The aircraft crashed at 2342 East
ern Standard Time, 18.7 miles west-northwest of Miami International Airport. Of the one hundred sixty-three passengers and thirteen crew members aboard, ninety-four passengers and five crew members received fatal injuries. The aircraft was destroyed.
Turkish Airlines Flight 981
FIRST OFFICER: What happened?
CAPTAIN: The cabin blew out.
[Eleven seconds have passed]
FIRST OFFICER: Are you sure?
CAPTAIN: Bring it up! Pull her nose up!
FIRST OFFICER: I can't bring it up. She doesn't respond.
CAPTAIN: Acaba, nedir, nedir? ("Wonder what it is, what it is...?-the
catchline from a popular Turkish TV commercial.)
[Twenty-three seconds have passed.]
SECOND OFFICER: Nothing is left.
FIRST OFFICER: Seven-thousand feet.
(A HORN SOUNDS TO WARN THAT THE AIRPLANE HAS EXEEDED THE 'NEVER-EXCEED'
SPEED)
(Thirty-two seconds have passed)
CAPTIAN: Hydraulics?
FIRST OFFICER: We have lost it...Oops, oops!
[Fifty-four seconds have passed.]
CAPTAIN: It looks like we are going to hit the ground.
[Fifty-six seconds have passed.]
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Flight 981 hit the ground at 490 miles per hour. None of the three
hundred and forty-six passengers and crew survived. The aircraft was
destroyed.
FIRST OFFICER: Sure can.
CAPTAIN: That's all right. That's all right, you're doin' all the good in
the world. I thought we'd get. I thought it was moving that way on me
only, we just kinda turned a little bit while you was looking at the
map.
FIRST OFFICER: Look.
CAPTAIN: First time I ever made a mistake in my life.
FIRST OFFICER: I'll be damned. Man, I wish I knew where we were so we'd
have some idea of the general terrain around this damned place.
CAPTAIN: I know what it is
FIRST OFFICER: What?
CAPTAIN: That the higher point out here is about twelve hundred feet. The
whole general area, and then we're not even where that is. I don't
believe.
FIRST OFFICER: I'll tell you what, as long as we travel northwest, instead
of west, and I still can't Paris...(WHISTLING)
CAPTAIN: Go ahead and look at it. (WHISTLING)
FIRST OFFICER: Two hundred and fifty, we're aboutto pass over Page VOR.
You know where that is?
CAPTAIN: Yeah.
FIRST OFFICER: All right.
CAPTAIN: About a hundred and eighty degrees of Texarkana
FIRST OFFICER: About a hundred and fifty-two. Minimum en rout altitude
here is forty-four hund...
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Flight 665 crashed into the steep, heavily wooded north slope of Black Fork
Mountain in the Ouachita Mountain Range at an elevation of 2,025 feet,
about 600 feet below the top of the ridge. The memebers
and eight passengers of Flight 655 suffered fatal injuries and the aircraft
was destroyed
United Airlines Flight 266
1819:04
LOS ANGELES DEPARTURE CONTROL: United 266, go ahead
First Officer: Ah, we've had a fire warning on Number One engine we shut
down. We'd like to come back.
1819:10
LOS ANGELES DEPARTURE CONTROL: United 266, roger. What is your present
altitude?
1819:13.5
(COCKPIT VOICE RECORDER OPERATION STOPPED)
0000.00
(COCKPIT VOICE RECORDER RESUMED OPERATION AT AN INDETERMINATE LATER
TIME)
0000.02
SECOND OFFICER: We're gonna get screwed up. I don't know [what's going
on]
0000.06
FIRST OFFICER: Keep it going up, Arnie. You're a thousand feet...pull it
up...
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
United Flight 266 crashed at approximately 1821, four minutes after its
initial takeoff roll, at a point 11.5 miles west of the airport in the
Pacific Ocean. The six crew members and the thirty-two passengers
suffered fatal injuries. The aircraft was destroyed
Trans Wolrd Airlines Flight 5787
1232:43
INSTRUCTOR-PILOT: What happened? (BACKGROUND SCREAMING, STALL WARNING ALARM-
STICKSHAKER-BEGINS AND LASTS FOR FIVE SECONDS)
1232:44.5
CAPTAIN: Give me that engine! (SOUND OF ENGINE SPOOLDOWN)
1232:46
INSTRUCTOR-PILOT: Harry...we're over!
1232:48
CAPTAIN: Give me the engine!
1232:48.4
ATLANTIC CITY TOWER: Ah, look out!
1232:50
INSTRUCTOR-PILOT: We're over.
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Flight 5787 had entered a steep, descending right turn and hit the aircraft
parking ramp adjacent to the airfield's hangar. All five persons aboard
the aircraft received fatal injuries. The aircraft was destroyed.
Republic Airlines Flight 303
2326:58
SALT LAKE CENTER: Roger, just maintain your present altitude and, ah, we can
either give you Bryce Canyon or take you over to Cedar City. That might be
your best bet.
2327:12.2
RC 303: I think Bryce Canyon would probably be the best choice here. We are
going to see if we can talk to company or someone here. Do you want to give
us a heading to Bryce Canyon here?
2327:26
SALT LAKE CENTER: Republic 303, ah, right heading two nine five.
2327:34.8
RC 303: Two nine five, roger.
After consulting with their company representatives on the ground, Republic 303
decided to fly past Bryce Canyon and landed safely at Las Vegas International
Airport. The probably cause of the engine failure was poor fuel management.
In Las Vegas, all one hundred forty-six passengers and crew exited the aircraft
without injury.
Eastern Airlines Flight 212
1133:17
CAPTAIN: There's, ah, Ross. Now we can go on down.
1133:22
FIRST OFFICER: How about fifty degrees [flaps], please.
1133:25
CAPTAIN: Fifty. [To Charlotte Tower] Eastern 212 by Ross.
1133:44
CHARLOTTE TOWER: Eastern 212, clear to land, three six.
1133:52
CAPTAIN: Yeah, we're all ready. All we got to do is find the airport
1133:58
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
The aircraft struck trees, broke up, and burst into flames about 1.75 miles
from Ross intersection and about 3.3 miles short of the threshold of Runway
36. The crew's lack of altitude awareness during the approach was the probable
cause of the crash. Of the eighty-two people on board, ten passengers and
two crew members survived. The aircraft was destroyed.
1348:35.3
CAPTAIN: They sure do.
1348:37.0
FIRST OFFICER: Not very good, is it? Top minimums. [Pause] I don't have it. Decision height...You got a hundred and five, sinkin' five...
CAPTAIN: All right, Keep a real sharp eye out here...
FIRST OFFICER: Okay. Oh this...is low. You can't see through this stuff.
1349:20.5
CAPTAIN: I can see the water. I got [it sighted] straight down.
1349:23.8
FIRST OFFICER: Ah, yeah, I can see the water. We're right over the water! Man, we ain't twenty feet off the water...Hold it.
1349:30.9
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Allegheny Flight 485 struck a row of beach cottages at an altitude of 29 feet
at a distance of 4,980 feet from the threshold of Runway 2. Twenty-eight
passengers and two crew members were fatally injured. Two passengers and the
First Officer survived. The aircraft was destroyed.
Mohawk Airlines Flight 40
1448:02
CAPTAIN: Pull back! Pull back! Keep workin'. We're makin it. Pull back,
straight now. Climb now. That's it, easy now. Now cut the gun, cut the gun,
we're in now.
1446:23
FIRST OFFICER: Ooooooh-weee! I don't like that.
1446:31
CAPTAIN: Ah, we better turn back toward Elmira. Now wait a minute, wait, ah,
let's go straight ahead.
FIRST OFFICER: Okay.
1446:37
CAPTAIN: What have we done to that damn tail surface, ya have any idea?
FIRST OFFICER: I don't know, ah, I, I just can't figure it out.
1446:44
FIRST OFFICER: Ah, we've lost both systems.
CAPTAIN: Both?
1446:47
CAPTAIN: I can't keep this...from...all right, I'm gonna use both hands now.
FIRST OFFICER: Okay.
CAPTAIN: Both hands. Pull her back! Pull 'er...[unintelligble]...power!
1447:11
CAPTAIN: I've gone out of control.
1447:17
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
A fire had destroyed the pitch control systems, causing Flight 40 to crash.
All passengers and crew received fatal injuries. The aircraft was destroyed.
Southern Airways Flight 932
HUNTINGTON: Roger, that's where they are, with the rabbit.
APPROACH CONTROL: Advise when you want them out.
FIRST OFFICER: Very good.
CAPTAIN: This autopilot ain't responding just right-sluggish.
FIRST OFFICER: Yeah.
CAPTAIN: Might catch up.
FIRST OFFICER: Okay, I got the time for you. A thousand feet above the ground,
rate and speed good. Speed a little fast, looks good, got bug and twelve.
1934:55.4
CAPTAIN: See something?
SECOND OFFICER: No, not yet. It's beginning to lighten up a little but on the
ground here at, ah, ah, seven hundred feet. Bug and five. We're two hundred
above.
1935:10.8
SECOND OFFICER: Bet it'll be a missed approach
1935:18.2
FIRST OFFICER: Four hundred [feet].
1935:19.3
CAPTAIN: That the approach?
FIRST OFFICER: Yeah. Hundred and twenty-six [feet].
1935:25.7
FIRST OFFICER: Hundred [feet].
1935:32.5
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Southern 932 impacted with treetops on a hill approximately one mile west of
the runway's threshold. The elevation of the treetops at the initial impact
site was approximately 922 feet. All seventy-five occupants, including
seventy-one passengers and four crew members were fatally injured. The aircraft
was destroyed
1618:02
CAPTAIN: Ah, we're putting it on the highway...we're down to nothing.
1618:07
FIRST OFFICER: Flaps.
CAPTAIN: They're at fifty [degrees].
FIRST OFFICER: Oh, Bill, I hope we can do it. I've got it, I got it. I'm
going to land right over that guy.
CAPTAIN: There's a car ahead...
1618:25
FIRST OFFICER: I got it, Bill, I've got it now, I got it.
CAPTAIN: Okay. Don't stall it...
FIRST OFFICER: I gotta bug. We're going to do it right here.
1618:33
STEWARDESS ON PA: Bend down and grab your ankles.
1618:34
FIRST OFFICER: I got it. (SOUND OF BREAKUP)
1618:39
(MORE BREAKUP SOUNDS)
1618:43
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
Ingested water and hail had damaged the engine compressors of Flight 242,
ultimately causing both engines to fail while the aircraft was cruising at
14,000 feet. When Flight 242 crashed, the fire that resulted destroyed a
combination grocery store-gasoline station, a truck and five automobiles,
along with numerous trees, shrubs, lawns, utility poles, power lines, mail
boxes, highway signs, and fences. Although seriously injured, twenty-two of
Flight 242's eighty-five passengers and crew survived the accident. The
aircraft was destroyed.
North Central Airlines Flight 458
0221:57.7
NCA 458 FIRST OFFICER: On a hundred...
O'HARE LOCAL CONTROL (TO TAXIING EASTERN FLIGHT 229): Eastern 229 up to the runway but hold short.
0222:03.0
NCA 458 CAPTAIN: Nine seventy-one, four thousand, flaps fifteen!
EA 229: Two twenty-nine.
AA 254: American 254 is, ah, on the runway and about to hold in position.
0222:11.7
NCA 458 CAPTAIN: Gear up!
O'HARE LOCAL CONTROL (TO AA 254): Okay, I'll have a release for you shortly.
AA 254: Okay.
0222:17.2
NCA 458 CAPTAIN: You got nine seventy-one on 'er?
NCA 458 FIRST OFFICER: You got it all, Dad! We're gonna hit!
0222:23.8
(SOUND OF IMPACT)
The NCA 458 hit the main door of a hangar located approximately sixteen hundred
feet from the left edge of the runway and approximately one hundred feet
southeast of the threshold. Twenty-seven of the forty-five passengers and crew
on board died. The aircraft was destroyed.
